Relationships

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Tortured, imperfect, and held by JesusGarrett Kell’s touching tribute to his mother, “My two earliest memories of my mother couldn’t be more different. The pleasant one is our evening routine: She’d pull me onto her lap to recite the Lord’s Prayer and sing “The Old Rugged Cross” until I fell asleep. The other is her sobbing in her bathroom, telling me how badly she wanted to die.”

  2. How Jesus helps my unbeliefErin Mount shares her struggle, “My mind knows that God has not left me, for there is nowhere I can go that he will not also be, but my heart has not felt him. All of the pain and sorrow and sickness would be much easier to bear had I felt God’s comfort, but for whatever reason, God has not felt near. It has felt like he was hiding, and as much as I have tried to find him, I couldn’t.”

How to Make Yourself At Home At (Almost) Any Church

How to Make Yourself At Home At (Almost) Any Church

“This year my resolution is to get back to God.” My friend shared his resolution with me and my heart leapt. He asked me how he could start that journey. I encouraged him to read a gospel and to connect with a church. He’s only been to church a few times in his life and I could feel the anxiety creep up on him as he considered the possibility.

When was the last time you were at church? Maybe it’s been years. Just thinking of your last time at church might make you recoil a bit. Perhaps it was the music, the awkward coffee hour, the rambling sermon.

Marshmallows and Friends

Marshmallows and Friends

Most have heard of the famous Stanford marshmallow experiment. In 1970, psychologist Walter Mischel invited kids into his lab. A child was offered a marshmallow that they could eat, or, if they waited until the researcher returned, they were given a second marshmallow. About one-third of the kids waited approximately fifteen minutes for the additional reward.

The study then tracked those children over time and found that children who waited for the second reward tended to have higher SAT scores and lower body mass indexes. Later tests have challenged those outcomes, but it hasn’t stopped parents everywhere from running the experiment on their kids, often with humorous results.

Why Satan Wants You to Think You're Alone

Why Satan Wants You to Think You're Alone

“I’m sure no one has ever told you this.”

“It’s so bad. You are going to think terrible things about me.”

“Everyone would hate me if they knew what I was thinking.”

“There is no one who loves me for me.”

I’ve heard each of these helpless words from those who sat on the couch in my office. They are raw, vulnerable, and heartbreaking confessions. The words leak their hearts’ crippling loneliness and fears that they are destined to remain alone.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Maybe you don’t need a therapistO. Alan Noble says, “I suspect that many people don’t need to see a therapist, or will only need to see one for a brief time to deal with an acute problem like the loss of a loved one. Everyone will suffer. Everyone will need wise counsel and encouragement and guidance and someone to talk to, but not everyone needs that guidance to come from a licensed mental health professional.”

  2. We can’t be friendsT.M. Suffield writes on the absence of deep male friendship and how to buck the trend, “And perhaps,

What Do Teens Believe?

What Do Teens Believe?

Are you encouraged or discouraged about teens? If you’re a teen, what is your perception of your peers? Are you hopeful? Or pessimistic? Not long ago, One Hope released a massive global study on the state of teens worldwide. In the report, we find reasons to be encouraged and causes for concern. 

Spending time reflecting on what teens believe and do ought to help shape the way we pray for them and relate to them. I’ll process five sections of the report: Christian practice, struggles, social media, sexuality, and the meaning of life in teens’ lives and then draw some conclusions.

Why Did They Ghost Me?

Why Did They Ghost Me?

I love gardening. I love helping bring something to life, nurturing it, and watching it flourish.

I am not particularly great at gardening, though. Any improvement I’ve had has come through the school of hard knocks: a plant I put in the wrong soil, a plant placed in the incorrect amount of sunlight, or not giving a plant the right amount of water (my default is always that more must be better—it isn’t).

Relationships are like plants, aren’t they? They are fragile. They are challenging.

Paul's Advice To a College Freshman

Paul's Advice To a College Freshman

Today, I hand this space over to my daughter, Camille, a rising junior in college. I asked Camille what advice she would offer to those who are making the jump from high school to college. Even if it doesn’t apply to you, I bet you’ll be interested in what she has to say.

-John

If Only I Had More Time...

If Only I Had More Time...

Today I hand the reins over to Josh Barella. Josh is a friend and our Worship Director at New Life. Every Sunday morning, I wake up to a devotion that Josh sends to the worship team to prepare them for the day. Here is a recent devotion Josh shared.

My wife Lauren and I are fond of the niche science fiction film In Timestarring Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried.  Set in a future Ohio, the currency is time, and it’s also everyone’s life force.  Once born, you age until your 25th birthday, and that’s when “your clock” starts and you have one year to live.

How To Criticize Your Pastor

How To Criticize Your Pastor

When I was 20, my childhood church changed leadership. Soon after, the leadership changed the vision statement. I was a junior in college, across the country studying Bible and theology, with head knowledge that far outpaced my experience. Out of the infinite resources of my leadership experience (sarcasm alert!), I generously offered my wisdom free of charge and wrote a letter to the new lead pastor. I'm still embarrassed by that letter.

Twenty-five years later, I'm no stranger to being on the receiving end of those letters (and emails, Facebook messages, and texts).