Church, Culture
John Beeson
Disney Shirts and Being Part of Something Big

I was handed my Mickey Mouse shirt as we packed and told this was what I would wear (I would be matching our son, Soren). Camille and Angel, meanwhile, wore matching Minnie ears and red tank tops. It seemed a little over-the-top to me, but I’ll do anything for my family. On the day of our Disney adventure, we woke up early, got into the virtual queue for the Star Wars ride (which happened to be the best ride at the park—don’t miss it!), and strode out of our hotel down Disney Way. It was then I began to notice something: we were not alone. We passed group after group in matching outfits. “Ahhhh,” I thought, “this is what people do!”

Disney Shirts and Being Part of Something Big
Recommendations, Counseling, Wisdom
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. We’re living in the dystopian future Neil Postman predicted 40 years ago: Brett McCracken says, “From the rising of the sun to its going down, we scroll our way through the day. We scroll our way through life. And we are scrolling ourselves to death.”

  2. Five hard truths about marriage most couples learn too late: Psychologist Mark Travers’s findings echo truths in the Bible, “One of the biggest misconceptions about marriage is that truly compatible people don’t argue. But not only is conflict inevitable, it’s also essential.”

This Week's Recommendations
Biblical Studies, Christian Living, Death
John Beeson
Let not him who straps on his armor boast ...

We would do well to heed Ahab and Roosevelt’s warnings. In our contemporary world, shrunk by media, it is enticing to microwave hot takes for all types of issues. Geopolitical events, religious issues, and economic and social policies entice us to weigh in. We want to know what is right and wrong, good and evil, and we want to hold firm opinions in fields in which we have little to no experience.

Ben-hadad meant “son of Hadad,” the Syrian god of thunder. It’s a fitting name. He was booming and terrifying, but relatively harmless. There are a lot of Ben-hadads out there today, those who dial up every opinion to 100 decibels.

Let not him who straps on his armor boast himself as he who takes it off
Culture, Identity
John Beeson
The Worthlessness of Cool

When I was in high school, swimming was my best sport. I still remember the first time I saw Gary Hall, Jr. swim. I was a freshman and he was a senior. We were at the hallowed grounds of the Plummer Aquatic Center at Arizona State University in Tempe. Gary Hall, Jr.’s father was an Olympic swimmer and Gary Hall Jr. would one day join that class. In fact, Hall would go on to win ten Olympic medals. I had never seen anything like Hall in a pool before. At 6’6” and probably 225 pounds, Hall looked more like a linebacker than a swimmer. In the water, his body rose above the water higher than anyone else’s, seemingly buoyed at his hips by an invisible force. He swam freestyle with a hitch, almost strutting through the water.

The Worthlessness of Cool
Recommendations, Christian Living, Nature, Culture
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. An age of extinction is coming. Here’s how to survive. Ross Douthat portends, “The bottleneck of the digital age is different: The new era is killing us softly, by drawing people out of the real and into the virtual, distracting us from the activities that sustain ordinary life, and finally making existence at a human scale seem obsolete.”

  2. Chickens, elephants, and the illusion of freedom. Donal shares a simple, but memorable story, ““the chicken is tied to a tree for so long, that when it is released, as long as it has the string on its ankle (do chickens have ankles?) it thinks it cannot go any further than the length of the original string. It is still attached in its own mind.”

This Week's Recommendations

marraige

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. We’re living in the dystopian future Neil Postman predicted 40 years ago: Brett McCracken says, “From the rising of the sun to its going down, we scroll our way through the day. We scroll our way through life. And we are scrolling ourselves to death.”

  2. Five hard truths about marriage most couples learn too late: Psychologist Mark Travers’s findings echo truths in the Bible, “One of the biggest misconceptions about marriage is that truly compatible people don’t argue. But not only is conflict inevitable, it’s also essential.”

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

“The biggest problem in our marriage is our communication.” It’s perhaps the most frequent issue that is brought to the table when Angel (my wife and counselor) and I meet with couples. At the core of many marriage seminars and conferences is the issue of how to improve the communication in your marriage.

I don’t buy it. Your marriage doesn’t need better communication.

Alright, alright. I’m overstating that for dramatic effect. Communication is important and often needs work. There are some helpful things you can do to improve communication in your marriage. But the fact remains: I’ve yet to encounter a marriage that the fundamental issue is communication. More serious issues always lurk beneath the surface.

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If Only I Had More Time...

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If Only I Had More Time...

Today I hand the reins over to Josh Barella. Josh is a friend and our Worship Director at New Life. Every Sunday morning, I wake up to a devotion that Josh sends to the worship team to prepare them for the day. Here is a recent devotion Josh shared.

My wife Lauren and I are fond of the niche science fiction film In Time, starring Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried.  Set in a future Ohio, the currency is time, and it’s also everyone’s life force.  Once born, you age until your 25th birthday, and that’s when “your clock” starts and you have one year to live.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. The blame game: Casey McCall asks, “What is it about our race that leads us to reflexively—subconsciously even—defer responsibility and search for excuses in the face of blame? I notice it in myself, in my children, and in people I counsel.”

  2. When is a couple considered married? Robby Lashua responds to common questions, “When is a couple considered married? After the ceremony? When they sign the license? After sex? What verses support this?”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. The world cannot be gender blind: Trevin Wax, “One of the strange ironies of our times: a significant segment of the left pushes back forcefully against the idea of “color blindness” regarding race but demands what amounts to “gender blindness” regarding sex…”

  2. Violent pornography’s assault on the marriage bed: A very sobering read from Joe Carter, “Because these images are being fed to him when his personality is still being formed and his sexuality is developing, he begins to confuse his desires with those he sees in porn…

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Our Rescue Story

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Our Rescue Story

“What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?” It is not that Thomas doesn’t believe marriage can be a source of joy, but that we ask too much if we ask marriage to bring us our “happily ever after.” Joy will likely trail holiness if we make that the main aim in marriage, but if we aim at happiness, we will miss both happiness and holiness.

 Angel and I can testify to how fragile marriage is. In the summer of 2009, our marriage began unraveling after my first three years of pastoral ministry—years I neglected Angel for my mistress, the church.

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Your Secrets Keep You Sick

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Your Secrets Keep You Sick

We were stuck. “I’m done with the marriage,” she said. Years of subtle neglect had shut her down. She would remain married, but there would be no marriage. He was desperate. He heard his wife’s hurt and confessed his neglect. He was willing to change. In our sessions thereafter, he appeared earnest and his actions seemed to prove his sincerity. But she didn’t trust him and wouldn’t let down her guard.

Deep down, I felt something was amiss, but I didn’t know what it was. Several times she assured us that there was no other man involved.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. ·  Geopsychology: your personality depends on where you live: Take a look at where you live and have lived on this and see if it lines up. Agreeableness and conscientiousness stood out to me.

  2. ·  The professionals most likely to be paired up in marriage: Andrew Van Dam stuffs a lot more than you might think in this report. He begins, “The top spot goes to medical doctors, according to our analysis of responses to the Census Bureau’s American Community Survey over the past decade. Not-that-kind-of-doctors, also known as college professors, come in second.”

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Trading Faces Identity Quiz

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Trading Faces Identity Quiz

So, who are you? Many respond to that question by sharing their roles: “I am a mom.” “I am a dad.” “I am a sister.” “I am a wife.” “I am a husband.” “I am a lawyer.” “I am a teacher.” “I am an athlete.”

It’s not surprising that we answer the question this way. One of the first questions we ask children is “What do you want to be when you grow up?” It’s a fine question, but by asking it over and over again, we teach kids that they are what they do. We coach our children to substitute roles for true identities.

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How to Waste Your Counseling

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How to Waste Your Counseling

I forgot that I knew him. Our pre-marital counselor sat behind his oak desk with a large smile peeking out from under his white mustache. His gentle eyes reassured me. Angel and I slid into the love seat, facing him. It was my first counseling session. Angel’s, too. We were here for pre-marital counseling.

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