Culture, Consumerism, Wisdom, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Redeem the Time

“In 2025, the average person worldwide [spent] 6 hours and 45 minutes staring at screens every single day — almost half of all waking hours.” For Americans, 3 hours of that time were spent watching TV and videos and 1.5 hours were spent on social media. We would do well to heed the wisdom of Author Annie Dillard who reminds us that, “How we spend our days… is how we spend our lives.” Her observation is not just poetic, it’s diagnostic.

We just launched a sermon series entitled Feedback Loop, inviting us to live wisely in an age of foolishness.

Redeem the Time
Forgiveness, Culture, Identity, Prayer, Spiritual Growth, Suffering
John Beeson
Don't "Give Yourself Grace"

My friend was lost. Over cups of coffee, he shared what had been bottled up inside of him for months. It was hard to figure out which came first, his depression or his spiritual spiral. Secret porn and drug addictions were now coupled with a full-blown affair, culminating with his wife demanding that he move out. He was confused and hurting, hard-hearted and spiritually blind. “My girlfriend tells me I just need to give myself grace,” he shared.

“Give yourself grace” has become a common refrain in our culture.

Don't "Give Yourself Grace"
Recommendations, Culture, Death, Family, History, Parenting, Nature, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. The birds and the bees, baby and me: Karen Swallow Prior says, “Childlessness can be a calling in the same way that being a parent is a calling, or as marriage or celibacy can be callings. Not to be called to something is inherently to be called to something else, even if that something else is elusive for a while.”

  2. Sabbath is more than self-care: Megan Hill says, “The Sabbath unplugs us from our daily work. But simply unplugging is only half the story. On the Sabbath, the Lord frees us from work and frees us unto worship.”

This Week's Recommendations
Christian Living, Identity, Prayer, Spiritual Growth, Wisdom
John Beeson
Pest Control and the Human Heart

I never thought much about the pest control industry—until that Saturday. As we prayer-walked the neighborhood adjacent to our church, I found myself chuckling at how many residents apparently worked for pest control companies. I began noticing and counting the trucks parked in driveways: Truly Nolen, Northwest, Greenshield, Responsible, Action, Western, Aptive, SOS. Eight pest control companies represented in a single neighborhood.

There are more than 34,000 pest control businesses in the United States employing over 167,000 specialists. Together, they generate upwards of $22 billion in annual revenue, and the industry is projected to grow steadily at a 5.7% rate annually. 

Pest Control and the Human Heart
Leadership, Reading, Relationships, Spiritual Growth, Theology
John Beeson
The Ring of Fellowship

JRR Tolkien had an elevated view of friendship. For years, he met with an informal group of literary friends called the Inklings at the Oxford pub, the Eagle and The Eagle and the Child (or, as the group called it, “The Bird and the Baby). Tolkien and CS Lewis were fast friends. Tolkien’s Ent Treebeard was fashioned after Lewis, and Lewis likely fashioned his protagonist Ransom in his Space Trilogy on Tolkien.

Both were shaped by The Great War, their love of languages and myths, and by their devotion to Christ. Tolkien, in fact, was crucial in Lewis’s conversion.

The Ring of Fellowship

repentance

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Don't "Give Yourself Grace"

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Don't "Give Yourself Grace"

My friend was lost. Over cups of coffee, he shared what had been bottled up inside of him for months. It was hard to figure out which came first, his depression or his spiritual spiral. Secret porn and drug addictions were now coupled with a full-blown affair, culminating with his wife demanding that he move out. He was confused and hurting, hard-hearted and spiritually blind. “My girlfriend tells me I just need to give myself grace,” he shared.

“Give yourself grace” has become a common refrain in our culture.

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Pest Control and the Human Heart

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Pest Control and the Human Heart

I never thought much about the pest control industry—until that Saturday. As we prayer-walked the neighborhood adjacent to our church, I found myself chuckling at how many residents apparently worked for pest control companies. I began noticing and counting the trucks parked in driveways: Truly Nolen, Northwest, Greenshield, Responsible, Action, Western, Aptive, SOS. Eight pest control companies represented in a single neighborhood.

There are more than 34,000 pest control businesses in the United States employing over 167,000 specialists. Together, they generate upwards of $22 billion in annual revenue, and the industry is projected to grow steadily at a 5.7% rate annually. 

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How to Apologize

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How to Apologize

We live in an apology-averse culture.

We are allergic to repentance and forgiveness alike.

Think about it. When was the last time someone repented to you? I mean, truly repented?

The last time a congregant apologized to me, the email began this way (I’ve tweaked it only to protect the one who sent it), “I might have been a little harsh in my email.. I had a very bad week…” In further communication, the individual referenced their apology. I scratched my head. “When did they apologize?” I dug back through the email thread and saw those phrases. That is what they were referencing.

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

“The biggest problem in our marriage is our communication.” It’s perhaps the most frequent issue that is brought to the table when Angel (my wife and counselor) and I meet with couples. At the core of many marriage seminars and conferences is the issue of how to improve the communication in your marriage.

I don’t buy it. Your marriage doesn’t need better communication.

Alright, alright. I’m overstating that for dramatic effect. Communication is important and often needs work. There are some helpful things you can do to improve communication in your marriage. But the fact remains: I’ve yet to encounter a marriage that the fundamental issue is communication. More serious issues always lurk beneath the surface.

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Why Do I Have To Keep On Forgiving?

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Why Do I Have To Keep On Forgiving?

Why do I have to keep forgiving him?

I’ve heard it many times as a pastor. It’s said with weariness and hurt, or bitterness and anger, or confusion and longing. It can mean at least four things.

  • “It hurts too much to keep forgiving him for repeated sins.”

  • “Can’t I just overlook her sin against me?”

  • “He hurt me so deeply that he doesn’t deserve forgiveness.”

  • “Why am I still hurting over an offense when I said I forgave her?”

What does God’s Word have to say about each of these situations?

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. Which Sins are Feeding Your Sin of Lust? David Powlison talks about how important it is to press into the sin behind the sin of lust. He shares a breakthrough with one client, “Look what we just found out: another movie was playing in a theater next door. Suddenly we were not only dealing with a couple of bad behaviors: viewing pornography and masturbating. We were dealing with anger at God that was driving those behaviors. What was that about?”

  2. How to Give (and Receive) Repentance: Blake Glosson begins with this fun question, “Imagine you’re on Family Feud and Steve Harvey gives the following prompt: “We asked 100 sinners, ‘Name one reason why you do not repent of your sin to one another.’ The top seven answers are on the board.” What do you think the most common answers would be?”

  3. Don’t Always Be Efficient: If you’re like me, you might need this word from Seth Lewis. He asks, “Who wants an efficient friendship? Or marriage? Who would want to visit an efficient park, or art museum? Who prefers drive-through fast food to a slow evening meal where the conversation lasts longer than the courses? It’s great to be efficient, but it’s not always great.”

  4. Even the Darkness: Meredith Beatty shares, “As a child I was afraid of the dark, afraid that something sinister lurked under my bed just waiting to grab the stray toe hanging off the edge. But as an adult there’s a different kind of darkness, not literal, but just as scary. It’s one no one seeks and can descend upon us at any time. An uninvited blackout that clouds our hearts and brings despair.”

  5. Naturalism is Nonsense: The late RC Sproul doesn’t mince words in this short clip.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. 6 Ways Christians Can Respond to Our Strange New World: Carl Trueman begins, “The world has shifted under our feet. New notions about selfhood challenge Christians’ views, and we’ve found ourselves in a hostile place where it’s dangerous to challenge the new status quo. To object to same-sex marriage, for example, is in the moral register of the day not substantially different from being a racist.”

  2. Four Questions to Help You Examine Unwanted Thoughts: Esther Smith asks, “Do you experience thoughts you don’t want? Do you ruminate on beliefs about yourself, the world, or God that feel true even though you know they are not? Do you feel tormented by depressed, anxious, or intrusive thinking? Are you uncertain about what to do with some of the thoughts that enter your mind?”

  3. The Difference Between Repentance and Self-Hate: Lara D’Entremont starts, “If self-hate could change a person, I would have reached perfection by now—at least, that’s what my therapist told me.

  4. When It Seems the Lord is Sleeping: James Williams concludes, “When the wind is howling and the waves are overbearing, remember our Lord promised he would always be with us, even if it seems he’s asleep on the boat. He doesn’t always work according to our timing, but he is always at work. Our trust is not in ourselves or the circumstances we see around us, but rather in the one whom even the wind and sea obey.”

  5. Comedy Pet Photography Awards: Sure to make you smile.

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Fighting for Victimhood

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Fighting for Victimhood

As a boy I was fascinated with pain. I often wondered how the pain I felt compared to pain others felt. I mostly kept this to myself, but there was at least one occasion I got into an argument with friends about who had experienced the most pain.

We all shared our stories: fractured limbs, concussions, road rash, and a hernia (that was my best card). As each story concluded the storyteller would lean back, content with his story, expecting white flags to be raised in defeat. But, in fact, each of us was disappointed with the reception of our tales of woe as the next storyteller would jump in, one-upping the last teller’s story of pain with his own.

I look back with embarrassment at the immaturity and narcissism this pain one-upmanship revealed in me. And yet, is this not the culture we live in today: a culture of victimhood?

The Royal Flush of Victimhood

There is nothing more powerful in today’s culture than playing the card of victimhood. And there appear to be more playing that card than ever before.

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The Robbery of Victimhood

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The Robbery of Victimhood

As a boy I was fascinated with pain. I often wondered how the pain I felt compared to pain others felt. I mostly kept this to myself, but there was at least one occasion I got into an argument with friends about who had experienced the most pain.

We all shared our stories: fractured limbs, concussions, road rash, and a hernia (that was my trump card). As each story concluded the storyteller would lean back, content with his story, expecting white flags to be raised in defeat. But, in fact, each of us was disappointed with the reception of our tales of woe. Our friends seemed unmoved by our ghastly pain and then would jump in with their own story, believing they could one-up the pain the last storyteller experienced.

I look back with embarrassment at the immaturity this pain one-upmanship revealed in me. My lack of empathy revealed a narcissistic heart. Thinking that my own pain was greater than anyone else’s only demonstrated my ego. Today’s culture of victim reveals similar truths about our collective hearts.

The Wild Draw Four Card of Victimhood

There is nothing more powerful in today’s culture than playing the card of victimhood. Like a kid holding onto the Wild Draw Four card in Uno, we hold tight to our victim card, pulling it out at just the right moment, expecting it to guarantee our victory.

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Our Story: Restoration

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Our Story: Restoration

The week following Angel’s (her words will be italicized) confession of adultery I was in a state of shock. I was still trying to navigate the situation with my identity as a pastor intact. Even when we came to our Senior Pastor, I said that I could still preach Sunday (just a few days away) as I was scheduled. Fortunately, wisdom prevailed.

I was asked to take a leave of absence, which was difficult for me to accept. The next six months would be the most difficult months of my life. Angel’s confession of her affair would be peeled back. Her confession of one affair became confession of a series of affairs and I would have to come face to face with the ugliness of my own heart. From the time I was ten, my understanding of my identity was inextricable from my calling as a pastor. I was about to not be a pastor any longer.

Days after we met with our Senior Pastor, we met with the Ministry Director at the ministry where Angel was working. They graciously allowed her to shift her job and stay on as their book store manager.

Our church’s leadership was not only generous enough to support us with counseling, but they also brought in a conciliation ministry called Live at Peace. The partnership would initially be difficult for me, in particular, as our conciliators recommended that my leave of absence become semi-permanent, with a two-year reconciliation period. “How is that fair?” I questioned. “Why am I being punished for what my wife did against me?”

Counseling was really rocky as well. I thought we would be working to repair our relationship and work through the damage, but what our counselors quickly became aware of is that Angel had compartmentalized a significant amount of the previous two and a half years. Every session peeled back more hurtful layers.

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