Marriage

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. The world cannot be gender blindTrevin Wax, “One of the strange ironies of our times: a significant segment of the left pushes back forcefully against the idea of “color blindness” regarding race but demands what amounts to “gender blindness” regarding sex…”

  2. Violent pornography’s assault on the marriage bedA very sobering read from Joe Carter, “Because these images are being fed to him when his personality is still being formed and his sexuality is developing, he begins to confuse his desires with those he sees in porn…

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. The data is clear: people are having less sexRyan Burge concludes, “Who would have thought that Mark Zuckerberg building an app to try and meet girls would eventually be one of the causes of declining fertility. But, here we are.”

  2. Climb a mountain, swim a sea, fight a dragonTim Challies on grace and works, “I think that if Elisha had told Naaman to do something hard and heroic, he would have gladly done it. If he had been told to climb a mountain or swim a sea or fight a dragon, he would have embarked on so noble a quest.

Our Rescue Story

Our Rescue Story

“What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?” It is not that Thomas doesn’t believe marriage can be a source of joy, but that we ask too much if we ask marriage to bring us our “happily ever after.” Joy will likely trail holiness if we make that the main aim in marriage, but if we aim at happiness, we will miss both happiness and holiness.

 Angel and I can testify to how fragile marriage is. In the summer of 2009, our marriage began unraveling after my first three years of pastoral ministry—years I neglected Angel for my mistress, the church.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Why I’m not an exvangelicalCarey Nieuwhof explains, “I, too, am tired of the abuse, corruption, arrogance, shallow thinking, anti-intellectualism, partisanship, and politicization of the Christian message. I’m done with the racism, toxic culture, and the abuse of power we see again and again.”

  2. What do Mormons believe about marriage? Liesl Counterman explains, “In Mormonism, the bare minimum entrance requirement to eternal life is baptism, but the way to reach the highest heaven is through marriage.”

The Top Ten Ways to Lead in Your Home (and Organization, Too!)

The Top Ten Ways to Lead in Your Home (and Organization, Too!)

In the past post we considered the biblical priority of leading in our homes before stepping into leadership callings outside of our home.

When I was asked to speak to our Mom’s Matter group on leading well in the home I was a bit intimidated. I felt far from equipped to speak as a man to women on the topic of leadership. And so, I did the only thing I could think of: I asked wise, godly women who were also great leaders. Starting with my wife, I began to listen to the advice my female friends offered on leadership in the home and beyond.

Leadership In Your Home and Beyond

Leadership In Your Home and Beyond

Who are the most influential leaders in your life? What made them such great leaders?

I fear that our cultural understanding of leadership is going further astray from true leadership. We Americans seem to have a bizarre attraction to two types of leaders: celebrities and powerful communicators with bold, brash opinions. We judge leaders by the size of their platform.

Some time ago I was asked to speak to the Moms Matter group in our church about healthy leadership in the home and beyond. One of the comments made by the leadership team was that many moms believe they “don’t need to be or can’t be a leader because they are just moms.” We can all similarly dismiss ourselves.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Lifetimes in landscapes: Brianna Lambert with a wonderfully evocative piece of writing, “He grew up in the foothills of the forest. Where the horizon disappeared behind the blue ridges. He’d spend his days with his eyes lifted towards the clouds that kissed the forehead of the mountaintops.”

  2. How to get the most out of your counseling sessionsJason Hsieh says, “Just as you would take a doctor’s medical prescriptions seriously. You can do this by regularly reviewing those particular biblical perspectives and following through on any new habits to form that you discuss.”

Why Do I Have To Keep On Forgiving?

Why Do I Have To Keep On Forgiving?

Why do I have to keep forgiving him?

I’ve heard it many times as a pastor. It’s said with weariness and hurt, or bitterness and anger, or confusion and longing. It can mean at least four things.

  • “It hurts too much to keep forgiving him for repeated sins.”

  • “Can’t I just overlook her sin against me?”

  • “He hurt me so deeply that he doesn’t deserve forgiveness.”

  • “Why am I still hurting over an offense when I said I forgave her?”

What does God’s Word have to say about each of these situations?

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. ·  Geopsychology: your personality depends on where you live: Take a look at where you live and have lived on this and see if it lines up. Agreeableness and conscientiousness stood out to me.

  2. ·  The professionals most likely to be paired up in marriage: Andrew Van Dam stuffs a lot more than you might think in this report. He begins, “The top spot goes to medical doctors, according to our analysis of responses to the Census Bureau’s American Community Survey over the past decade. Not-that-kind-of-doctors, also known as college professors, come in second.”

How to Waste Your Counseling

How to Waste Your Counseling

I forgot that I knew him. Our pre-marital counselor sat behind his oak desk with a large smile peeking out from under his white mustache. His gentle eyes reassured me. Angel and I slid into the love seat, facing him. It was my first counseling session. Angel’s, too. We were here for pre-marital counseling.