Christian Living, Culture, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Cheater

I am not an avid gamer.  

 

I've aspired to be at different intersections of my life, but I just don't have the knack.  And so it goes for those who can throw the football nearly a hundred yards right out of the box, versus those who struggle even to catch the thing.  Thus, the advent of practice, and training.  There have been innumerable stories of nobodies becoming somebodies across history by putting in the effort, by showing up, working hard, day after day until the breakthrough.  For this there is no substitution.

Cheater
Family, Parenting, Relationships, Religion, Wisdom
John Beeson
Your Soccer Coach Has a Plan for Your Life

“The coach says that he has the talent to play D-1 one day.” A friend’s son had just tried out for an elite club soccer team and they were weighing the decision. The travel club came with a hefty price tag and a commitment to regular out-of-town tournaments. They would say yes to the club. In a few years their son would burn out from playing soccer. But the impact on their family couldn’t be undone. They had built the patterns of their family in their kids’ early years around healthy spiritual rhythms, including regular church attendance. Club soccer changed those patterns.

Your Soccer Coach Has a Plan for Your Life
Recommendations, Death, Biblical Studies, Leadership, Nature
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. Relating to a narcissist: Ed Welch with a thoughtful and empathetic treatment of a growing concern, “Diagnostic labels have their benefits and liabilities. They can help you see certain behaviors. They can also blind you by leading you to believe that everything is a result of the diagnoses, which it is not. For the person who wears the label, the word can be meaningless or offensive. It will not help.”

  2. 6 kinds of hearers of God’s Word: Brian Najapfour pulls his list straight from scripture. For instance, “She knows that she has blemishes, but she is afraid to face them. Like someone who avoids the doctor for fear of a bad diagnosis, Mrs. Afraid resists the conviction of the Word. She does not want to be confronted with the cost of repentance.”

This Week's Recommendations
Wisdom, Education, Family, Parenting
John Beeson
Not Enough Wisdom

It was a cool February afternoon three years ago, our family piled in our aptly named Escape heading East on the I-8. We weave our way through Laguna Summit and the Cleveland National Forest, summiting the final miles of California and her Santa Ana Mountains on our way back to our home in the Sonoran Desert.

We just visited Concordia University, Irvine, a Lutheran school where our eldest, Camille, was offered a generous scholarship. Camille fell in love with Concordia’s professors, mission, and solid theological foundation on the trip. We rejoiced at her finding such a perfect fit for her. And we mourned her impending departure.

Not Enough Wisdom
Nature, Worship
John Beeson
Grateful Dust

Today I have the privilege of sharing a poem from my daughter, Camille. She is currently working at the South Rim of the Grand Canyon and composed this poem as a praise to the Lord, my Rock (praise to the Lord, my Rock (YHWH Tsuri, see Ps. 18:2, for instance). Note also that ebneezers are stone monuments that memorialize the Lord’s help (see 1 Sam. 7:12, for instance). Finally, “ranan” means “to shout for joy” in Hebrew. -John

Grateful Dust

Relationships

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Meant to Be: How a World War II veteran cheated death four times to find love. Bonnie Allen’s story on Reg Harrison is absolute perfection. It begins, “Reg Harrison slides his leather wallet out of his pocket and removes a weathered black-and-white photo of a beautiful woman. ‘I've been carrying that since 1946,’ said the 98-year-old. ‘Our love story? I think it was meant to be.’”

2. iGeneration and iDentity: Kyle Borg with a sobering warning to Generation Z on what the impact of them being formed by social media will mean: “Young people aged 8 to 12 spend an average of six hours a day on technology, and teenagers aged 13 to 18 spend an average of nine hours a day streaming videos, looking at pictures, listening to music, and playing games. That's more social time in a given day than is spent with parents, peers, or sports teams.”

3. Americans Less Optimistic About Race Relations: Aaron Earls reports, “A new study from Lifeway Research conducted prior to the 2020 election finds U.S. adults are less likely now than in 2014 to agree with the statement “We have come so far on racial relations.” Today, 46% say we have made worthwhile progress—28 points fewer than in 2014 when 74% said the same.”

4. Just Keep Going: David McLemore urges us forward. He encourages us, “But God is not letting up on us because he’s not giving up on us. His call is not to take it easy when it gets hard but to press in all the more, especially when it’s hard. The Lord loves us deeply, but he doesn’t coddle us, and he won’t let us coddle ourselves either. He knows the cancer that time is to our zeal, but he has fresh mercies every morning.”

5. In Defense of Um, Er, and Like: Such an enlightening video on why we have verbal hesitations and how they can, like, help.

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

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Your Marriage Doesn't Need Better Communication

“The biggest problem in our marriage is our communication.” It’s perhaps the most frequent issue that is brought to the table when Angel (my wife and counselor) and I meet with couples. At the core of many marriage seminars and conferences is the issue of how to improve the communication in your marriage.

I don’t buy it. Your marriage doesn’t need better communication.

Alright, alright. I’m overstating that for dramatic effect. There are some helpful things you can do to improve communication in your marriage. But the fact remains: I’ve yet to encounter a marriage that the fundamental issue is communication. More serious issues always lurk beneath the surface.

The reason that communication is often fore-fronted is that it is a neutral issue. Being a poor communicator isn’t a sin. We think if we can just learn new techniques, we will experience renewal in our marriage.

Communication isn’t your issue. Sin is your issue. Or, to put it in James’s language, your desires are your issue.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. The Most Important Election in US History: Keith Mathison gives us some helpful perspective. He begins with this quote, “We have had many important elections, but never one so important as that now approaching…. The republic is approaching what is to be one of the most important elections in its history.”

2. The Answer to Loneliness: Andrew Blunt begins, “Loneliness is a serious and growing problem. The stats are pretty heartbreaking. One study found that 9 million people in the UK are always or often lonely—that’s just slightly more than the population of London or the entire population of Australia.”

3. 3 Apologetic Approaches to Reach the Next Generation: Jacob Haywood sums up his three approaches this way, “The next generation should see that the gospel applies to their lives, answers their biggest questions, and fulfills their deepest longings.”

4. How Big Should You Think? And How Big Should You Act? I appreciate the way Eric Geiger considers this. He begins, “Some leaders seem to think small and act big. There is not a large vision that captivates them, grand plans that motivate them, or an overwhelming sense of awe for the opportunity in front of them. Yet at the same time they seem to act big. They hold tightly to their positions, enjoying that others view them as and and that they are able to make decisions that impact others. Their plans may be small, but they act large.”

5. The Science of Male and Female: What does God teach us about gender through nature? Steven Wedgeworth begins, “Recent breakthroughs in human genetics have made it clear that humanity is fundamentally dimorphic, which is to say, human nature is irreducibly male and female.”

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Life is Better Together

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Life is Better Together

“Wilson, where are you? Wilson! Wilson! I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Wilson. Wilson, I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Wilson! I can’t!”

If you’ve seen Cast Away, this scene is etched in your memory. Chuck Noland (played by Tom Hanks) is on his rudimentary raft trying to paddle to freedom when his beach volleyball companion falls off and begins floating away. Stranded on a deserted island for four years, the volleyball is Noland’s only friend. Your heart breaks as Noland’s inanimate friend drifts away.

Cast Away is a great movie not only about the triumph of the human spirit, but also about the reality that we are made to live in community. It can be watched as an extended meditation on God’s words in Genesis 2:18, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make a helper fit for him.” The very first thing our Triune God says is “not good” in creation is our aloneness.

GOD IS COMMUNITY

That isn’t surprising. God is community. Our Triune God has existed in community for eternity. Creation is an overflow of that love. Theologian Michael Reeves explains what it means that God is three-in-one, and not just one, “Everything changes when it comes to the Father, Son and Spirit. Here is a God who is not essentially lonely, but who has been loving for all eternity as the Father has loved the Son in the Spirit. Loving others is not a strange or novel thing for this God at all; it is the root of who he is.”[i]

When the apostle John says, “God is love” (1 John 4:8), he is speaking about the very nature of our three-in-one God. And so, when God creates us in his image, we are created to image this love. Theologian John Owen wrote God is “the fountain and prototype of all love… And all love in the creation was introduced from this fountain, to give a shadow and resemblance of it.”[ii] We were made to reflect the active love of God that has existed for eternity.

We need community to be who God has intended us to be.

Life is better together.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       The Worst Sales Promotion in History: You could say that this idea in the early 90's from the desperate leaders at Hoover totally sucked.

2.       Life After the Death of My Son: Simonetta Carr on the importance of ordinary faithfulness following tragedy. She says, "’[God's] not too busy to be with me in seemingly insignificant moments while he turns the wheels of history. This might not always be evident to my limited perception, but the same Christ who rose from the dead tells me it’s a reality on which I can count."

3.       Why I Wish We Hadn't Lived Together Before Marriage: Helpful article from Lisa Lakey. She concludes, " Doing things His way will always end better than me seeking my own will. No matter how right my way seems to me."

4.       4 Ways Conflict Can Help Your Church (and People) Grow: Dillon Smith packs in a lot of great wisdom here, " I’ve had to learn that minor moments of healthy conflict help you avoid massive moments of division that lead to disaster."

5.       Alive Again: I’ve just been introduced to Ahi and am loving getting to know his raspy, soulful voice.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.      The Funeral As We Know it is Becoming a Relic: Karen Heller reports that just as we are on the verge of a death boom, the rules of funerals are undergoing significant changes. She shares, " The movement will only accelerate as the nation approaches a historic spike in deaths. Baby boomers, despite strenuous efforts to stall the aging process, are not getting any younger. In 2030, people over 65 will outnumber children, and by 2037, 3.6 million people are projected to die in the United States, according to the Census Bureau, 1 million more than in 2015, which is projected to outpace the growth of the overall population."

2.      Be Slow to Assume: Being slow to anger begins with being slow to assume, Lara D'Entremont suggests: " Maybe this is what Peter meant by, “Love covers a multitude of sins,” (1 Peter 4:8). In my desire to assume the best of another, the small sins of another towards me are overlooked and covered, rather than racked up to be something greater than they were. Let’s toss poor assumptions, give some charity, stretch ourselves a little, and put grace on display."

3.      Why We Need to Stop Saying, "Sorry for Your Loss": This is written from a secular psychological perspective from Ed Preston. Preston is correct though, and I would suggest that the reasons as Christians are even stronger. He suggests, " Perhaps it’s because of our cultural death phobia, and the way it pathologizes everything related to sadness. If we’re not better at dealing with grief, then it’s because we’ve never been taught better. Unfortunately, that leaves the majority of people with only one stock phrase in their repertoire, “I’m sorry for your loss.”" He also includes some practical advice for what you can say.

4.      How to Get Your Church to Engage Scripture More: JR Briggs offers seven great ideas including, " Read a passage, and then ask people to write out 10-to-15 questions about the passage on a piece of paper. Why did the woman ask that of Jesus? What was running through Abraham’s mind when he was walking up the mountain to sacrifice Isaac? Allow people to interact with the text by courageously wrestling with tough questions."

5.      1 in 10 Young Protestants Have Left Church Over Abuse: Kate Shellnut reports on a recent Lifeway Research survey that contains sobering information. She concludes with practical changes churches can consider including, " Assess your church culture first and make needed changes: Do your current members experience safety and freedom in sharing their own stories of suffering?"

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       Free Throws Should Be Easy. Why do Professionals Miss? I enjoyed this story from Wired: " On paper, the free throw could not be more straightforward. It's a direct, unguarded shot at a hoop 18 inches across, 10 feet off the ground, and 15 feet away."

2.       Have you Talked to Your Kids About Sex? Helpful encouragement: "The sex and gender conversations in your home don’t have to be big, awkward productions. They don’t have to be embarrassing. And they certainly don’t need to be all planned out. But they do need to happen. The sooner the better. And they need to continue, the more often the easier. They absolutely must be rooted in biblical truth about how God designed our bodies and gave us the gift of gender and sex."

3.        How Relationships Spark Spiritual Growth: This is a really helpful matrix that will help any leader consider how they can grow their group relationally. Dan Mancini says that this process will, "remove hurdles to your growth... And you’ll get down into the root of the junk you’re carrying around in your life, and it will reveal motivations, appetites, and beliefs that no one (including you) knew you were carrying around.

4.       3 Things to Do When Someone is Suffering: Chris Hulshof considers what we can learn from Job's friends: " What does it look like to show up when someone is suffering? It looks like joining them right where they are and getting dirty with them amidst their grief and sorrow."

5.       8 Questions You Must Ask as you Fight Pornography: Deepak Reju offers great counsel. Two of the eight questions are "what lies are you believing?" and "will you be radical or passive about cutting out your sin?"

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       Saving Retirement: Jeff Haanen on the state of retirement. This is a very helpful read. He says, "Some are now seeing retirement as a social construct that allows them to take an intentional 3, 6, or 12 months of sabbatical rest to prepare the heart for a new season of fruitfulness (Lev. 25). Rhythms of preparation, worship, feasting, learning, simplicity, remembrance, and service are chosen over consumption, travel, or a premature jump into a new field."

2.      Why Treating Your Spouse Poorly Can Be So Easy: Dave Harvey considers his sin against his wife, and his compounding sin even as he sought forgiveness: "Several years ago I became aware of a subtle, destructive habit. Whenever I sensed I had sinned against Kimm I would go to her, confess, and seek to resolve the situation. Looks pretty good when I put it that way, doesn’t it? But I came to realize that my goal was far from noble. I wanted a quick and efficient restoration of our relationship so I could stop feeling bad and get on with 'more important things.'” 

3.      Heroes, Villains, and Guides: Glen Elliott ends his reflection on leadership with these important questions, " Be honest with yourself. What are you seeking? What’s your view of being a leader? Who are you really in your leadership role? Are you seeking to be the hero or intentionally choosing to be the servant who guides others to success?"

4.      Why Tithing Isn't a Pinnacle Virtue or Legalism: Randy Alcorn pushes on some significant barriers in our hearts, "So to those who say all New Testament offerings are freewill, I say fine. My question is, even if we’re convinced tithing is an antiquated practice that doesn’t apply to New Testament believers, if Old Testament saints could rob God by withholding freewill offerings, can’t we do the same? If not, why not?"

5.      The Relationship Timeline Continues to Stretch: Fascinating data that shows a few interesting trends including the fact that the time between meeting and marriage has nearly doubled in five decades, and how the average couple now lives together for over three years before marriage.

6. Romano Tours: This hilarious sketch by Adam Sandler is helpful truth serum for us as we head out on vacations this summer: “if you’re sad now, you might still feel sad then… you’re still going to be you on vacation.”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.      Why the Devil Didn't Think He Won When Jesus was on the Cross: I hadn't thought this through as clearly until I read this JA Medders post. His final reason is the strongest: " Fifth, as Jesus was hanging on the cross, he is tempted to get himself down from the cross. Why? This would cease his substituting death for us—Satan wouldn’t be disarmed and defeated. But Jesus did the Father’s will, he died and rose again for us. Defeating Satan every step of the way."

2.      How to Mend a Relationship That has Been Broken for Years: Vital Signs delivers consistently difficult, but healthy advice on matters related to conflict: Joseph Grenny offers, " I have come to believe that my capacity for joy in life is a function of my capacity to love imperfect people. And the most aggressive calisthenics of that capacity is practicing vulnerability at times of the most acute emotional risk."

3.      Seeing the Individual's Face: Jennie Cesario with one of the most beautiful reflections I've read in a while: "[T]o grow in the love of God is to expand my heart and vision in this way. To, little by little, allow more faces to become particular to me, more faces to become dear — whether they’re next to me in a church pew or against me in the voting booth; whether they’re my kindred or my worst enemies."

4.      What Teens Value Most: Helen Gibson reports on Pew Research Center's latest poll on teens. In it, having a career they enjoy ranks first, then helping others who are in need, and third is having a lot of money. Getting married is fourth and having children is fifth with less than 40% of teens saying they desire to have children one day.

5.      Is God Anti-Gay? Sam Alberry reflects on this big question during a Gospel Coalition panel (this is a podcast).

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