Family, Parenting, Relationships, Religion, Wisdom
John Beeson
Your Soccer Coach Has a Plan for Your Life

“The coach says that he has the talent to play D-1 one day.” A friend’s son had just tried out for an elite club soccer team and they were weighing the decision. The travel club came with a hefty price tag and a commitment to regular out-of-town tournaments. They would say yes to the club. In a few years their son would burn out from playing soccer. But the impact on their family couldn’t be undone. They had built the patterns of their family in their kids’ early years around healthy spiritual rhythms, including regular church attendance. Club soccer changed those patterns.

Your Soccer Coach Has a Plan for Your Life
Recommendations, Death, Biblical Studies, Leadership, Nature
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. Relating to a narcissist: Ed Welch with a thoughtful and empathetic treatment of a growing concern, “Diagnostic labels have their benefits and liabilities. They can help you see certain behaviors. They can also blind you by leading you to believe that everything is a result of the diagnoses, which it is not. For the person who wears the label, the word can be meaningless or offensive. It will not help.”

  2. 6 kinds of hearers of God’s Word: Brian Najapfour pulls his list straight from scripture. For instance, “She knows that she has blemishes, but she is afraid to face them. Like someone who avoids the doctor for fear of a bad diagnosis, Mrs. Afraid resists the conviction of the Word. She does not want to be confronted with the cost of repentance.”

This Week's Recommendations
Wisdom, Education, Family, Parenting
John Beeson
Not Enough Wisdom

It was a cool February afternoon three years ago, our family piled in our aptly named Escape heading East on the I-8. We weave our way through Laguna Summit and the Cleveland National Forest, summiting the final miles of California and her Santa Ana Mountains on our way back to our home in the Sonoran Desert.

We just visited Concordia University, Irvine, a Lutheran school where our eldest, Camille, was offered a generous scholarship. Camille fell in love with Concordia’s professors, mission, and solid theological foundation on the trip. We rejoiced at her finding such a perfect fit for her. And we mourned her impending departure.

Not Enough Wisdom
Nature, Worship
John Beeson
Grateful Dust

Today I have the privilege of sharing a poem from my daughter, Camille. She is currently working at the South Rim of the Grand Canyon and composed this poem as a praise to the Lord, my Rock (praise to the Lord, my Rock (YHWH Tsuri, see Ps. 18:2, for instance). Note also that ebneezers are stone monuments that memorialize the Lord’s help (see 1 Sam. 7:12, for instance). Finally, “ranan” means “to shout for joy” in Hebrew. -John

Grateful Dust
Recommendations, Culture, Marriage, Leadership, Relationships
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. Jesus doesn’t use fake plants: Casey McCall writes, “I get the appeal of fake plants. We want the fruit without the work, the aesthetic without the need to provide care. In my house, we’ve killed our fair share of indoor plants by neglecting to provide water and sunlight. Nonetheless, I’d rather have no plants than fake ones.”

  2. Discipline, delight, and staying on the path: Glenna Marshall begins, “My husband and I took our kids on a hike not too long ago, and before we hit the trail, we warned both of our sons to stay on the path at all times. The woods were filled with poison ivy, and one of my sons is quite the explorer.

This Week's Recommendations

Leadership

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The Top Ten Ways to Lead in Your Home (and Organization, too)!

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The Top Ten Ways to Lead in Your Home (and Organization, too)!

Last week we considered the biblical priority of leading in our homes before stepping into leadership callings outside of our home.

When I was asked to speak to our Mom’s Matter group on leading well in the home I was a bit intimidated. I felt far from equipped to speak as a man to women on the topic of leadership. And so, I did the only thing I could think of: I asked wise, godly women who were also great leaders. Starting with my wife, I began to listen to the advice my female friends offered on leadership in the home and beyond.

I discovered a few things. First, I was surprised how home-centric their advice was. These women are leaders in and out of their homes, but their focus was on the home. They intuited the biblical priority of the home that we considered in last week’s post. Second, I couldn’t believe how aligned their wisdom was. I presumed that I would have to significantly trim the advice they offered, but what I found was that there were strong echoes of their collective wisdom. Third, I was surprised by how relatively gender-neutral their wisdom was. If I was to give a talk to men on leadership in their home, I couldn’t improve on their list.

I sorted their wisdom into the top ten ways to lead in the home. I will share that, and then, return to the list and consider it with eyes beyond the home. What components of this list relate to outside of the home as well? What is different?

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Leadership in the Home and Beyond

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Leadership in the Home and Beyond

Who are the most influential leaders in your life? What made them such great leaders?

I fear that our cultural understanding of leadership is going further and further astray from what true leadership is. We Americans seem to have a bizarre attraction to two types of leaders: celebrities and powerful communicators with bold, brash opinions. We judge leaders by the size of their platform.

I was recently asked to speak to the Mom’s Matter group in our church about what healthy leadership in the home and beyond looks like. One of the comments by the leadership team that was made to me was that many moms believe they “don’t need to be or can’t be a leader because they are just moms.”

I believe that’s an issue with men and women alike. The task of leadership feels daunting and we feel like we are unequal to the task, and so we shrink back from it.

If leadership is influence, then every one of us is called to leadership. God has gifted you with influence. God has called and equipped you to influence your family. God has called and equipped you to influence your friends. God has called and equipped you to influence your church.

You are called to lead.

But the order of how we develop as leaders is important. We are called to lead our home first and that leadership is intended to cascade outward.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       Her Stillborn, Him Sovereign: Lianna Davis with a profound reflection on her daughter's stillbirth. Everyone should read this post. She concludes, " I do not know the total sum of sovereign goodness He plans from our child’s early departure from this world; His ways are mysterious. But I do know enough of Him to be sure that, whatever the sum is, He will yield it: “Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame” (Psalm 25:3)."

2.       First, Understand: Simple, but profound advice from Glen Elliott, "we are at our best as a leader and as a person when we seek to 'understand before being understood.' Our human pride that feeds our brokenness wants others to understand how we feel, why we did what we did or didn’t do first. But the key to great leaders is that they, out of humility, seek first to understand before being understood."

3.       An $8.2M Judgment, Over $8.2M Given Away, and God's Sovereign Grace: Randy Alcorn's amazing story of how an $8.2M judgment against him set off a different trajectory for him and his wife and God's incredible grace in the midst of what seemed to be horrible and unjust news. 

4.       Cremation: Why and Why Not: Jon Dykstra with a thoughtful analysis of the biblical argument for and against cremation.

5.       Audobon Photography Award Winners: Holy moly, these photos are incredible. 

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Anger, Retaliation, and my Scion xB

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Anger, Retaliation, and my Scion xB

I drive a little manual 2005 Scion xB that just eclipsed 195,000 miles. I love that little car. It’s fuel-efficient and requires minimal maintenance. And it’s close to the least powerful car on the road. I’m pretty sure on its specs next to 0-60mph it says, “Eventually!”

Unless I’m lined up against someone from a nearby retirement community (sorry, some stereotypes are true), I’m going to be the last car to reach the speed limit coming off a stoplight.

Temptation

Unsurprisingly, more aggressive drivers with more powerful vehicles tend to treat my little Scion like a safety cone in the road, they treat me more like an obstacle than a fellow traveler. They zip past me and cut me off as they speed to their destination. More than I would care to admit, my sense of justice and frustration with unsafe drivers slides into sinful anger. There have been more than a few times I have been tempted to cut off a driver in retaliation.

But I don’t.

Sometimes that is because I am pricked with quick repentance and shift a posture of mercy.

Sometimes that is because I drive a Scion xB.

Temptation and Power

Even if I wanted to retaliate, I don’t have the means to retaliate. My little four-cylinder can’t chase down those high-powered vehicles.

I’m so grateful for my under-powered Scion. It has protected me from my own sin on more than a few occasions.

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First, Break All the Rules: What the World's Greatest Managers Do Differently by Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman

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First, Break All the Rules: What the World's Greatest Managers Do Differently by Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman

Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman believe that all of the conventional rules for how leaders ought to manage are wrong. If we are going to learn to manage well, we need to break those rules.

About two years ago one of our pastors (Zach Imboden) introduced me to Strengths Finder. That then trickled down to our Executive Team and then our entire staff. It has been an encouragement to watch our team grow in our understanding of our own strengths and our co-workers strengths. The impact of learning to contribute our best and focus on the best contributions our teammates can make has made a significant difference.

When Zach tipped me off to this book this year, I was all-in. I’m so glad he did. It’s a great book. Gallup has been around for a long time and in that time they’ve been able to compile a tremendous amount of data on organizations, employers, and employees. They asked the best employers what their secrets of management were and the best employees what attracted, focused, and kept them at their job.

The twelve most important questions for attracting and keeping talented employees are:
1) Do I know what is expected of me at work?
2) Do I have the materials and equipment to do what I do best every day?
3) At work, do I have the opportunity to do what I do best every day?
4) In the last seven days, have I received recognition or praise for doing good work?
5) Does my supervisor, or someone at work, seem to care about me as a person?
6) Is there someone at work who encourages my development?

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Why You’re the Best Church in the World (for me)!

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Why You’re the Best Church in the World (for me)!

The uber-mega church Willow Creek Church is currently hiring for their senior pastor opening. Willow Creek doesn’t require much of an introduction. 24,000 people meet at seven campuses in the Chicagoland area. It launched the Global Leadership Summit, which drew 118,000 people last year.

Last year, Mariners church in Southern California searched for their new Senior Pastor. Every weekend 17,000 crowd into its lush campus that could easily be mistaken for a resort.

And (not that if they would!) if they called me, I wouldn’t even pick up. Seriously.

New Life, you’re the best church in the world for me.

Our minds and hearts naturally wander. We ponder whether there is something better out there. Ingratitude makes our hearts grumble. Ambition turns our eyes green. “If only…” we think.

When my heart turns inward, when I allow my sin to go unchecked, I go to this place too.

But here is the reality: God has called us to Tucson. He’s called us to New Life Bible Fellowship. He’s decided to use my gifts in and for New Life. He’s given me the privilege of shepherding his flock, of caring for his sheep.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       In Stores, Secret Surveillance Tracks Your Every Move: Well, this NY Times article by Michael Kwet certainly is disconcerting. He explains Bluetooth beacons, " ...are small, inobtrusive electronic devices that are hidden throughout the grocery store; an app on your phone that communicates with them informed the company not only that you had entered the building, but that you had lingered for two minutes in front of the low-fat Chobanis."

2.        Armchair Quarterbacks and Armchair Leaders: Eric Geiger reflects on a missed kick by Chicago's field goal kicker and the danger of Monday morning quarterbacking: " Whenever we evaluate a quarterback or a kicker, we typically evaluate them without understanding the whole context. For example, fans roasted Parkey before they discovered the kick was actually tipped off course by a defender. People often judge a leader’s decisions or actions without full understanding of the context surrounding those decisions. If the context were known, the armchair leader would likely make the same call."

3.       You've Heard of Cultural Marxism, Here is a Better Word to Call it: Neil Shenvi and Pat Sawyer with a dense, but thoughtful and helpful article on critical theory. They say that "critical theory claims that members of oppressed groups have special access to truth because of their “lived experience” of oppression. Such insight is unavailable to members of oppressor groups, who are blinded by their privilege."

4.       Are you Quarrelsome? The platform of social media seems to have unleashed a wave of quarrelsome people. Kevin DeYoung provides some helpful markers for us to consider. The first is " 1. You defend every conviction with the same degree of intensity. There are no secondary or tertiary issues. Everything is primary. You’ve never met a hill you wouldn’t die on."

5.       Stop Changing Your Oil Every 3,000 Miles: Edmunds on why you should be changing your oil closer to 7,500 to 10,000 miles.

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Why I’m a Better Pastor (for you) than… (Rick Warren, Tony Evans, Tim Keller, Alistair Begg, Albert Tate, Matt Chandler, Joel Osteen, John Piper, or Andy Stanley)

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Why I’m a Better Pastor (for you) than… (Rick Warren, Tony Evans, Tim Keller, Alistair Begg, Albert Tate, Matt Chandler, Joel Osteen, John Piper, or Andy Stanley)

You have access to the best pastors in America.

You have at your fingertips access to a trove of virtually endless content by some of the wisest and most powerful thinkers and speakers on the planet. As soon as you finish this post you can have them piped into your office, car, or living room and be impacted by their words. And I hope you do!

What a ridiculous gift we have! If you were born five hundred and fifty years ago in Europe, in all likelihood not only could you not read the Bible, but it was likely that your parish priest didn’t own a whole copy of the Latin Bible and since he knew only a handful of Latin words, he couldn’t even read the Bible. Fast forward a few decades to the Reformation and now, for the first time, you would hear the Bible read in your own language and its words applied to your life.

Fast forward five centuries to today and not only do we (in the West) have unfettered access to the Bible, but we have almost limitless access to some of the very best Bible teaching. What a gift we have!

And yet, that begs a question: how is a normal pastor like myself supposed to compete? Why should you even bother with attending your local church? Why settle for the best I can offer when you can watch the best that Tim Keller and Albert Tate and (fill in your favorite preacher here) can offer?!

The truth is that I can’t compete. I’ll never be on an “America’s Best Preachers” list like this. And frankly, I have no aspirations for that.

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Of Mice and Men’s 3.8 Rating and Handling Criticism

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Of Mice and Men’s 3.8 Rating and Handling Criticism

One of my favorite all-time books is the great American novel Of Mice and Men. This year I’ve been on a bit of a John Steinbeck binge. I’ve picked up some of his classics that I enjoyed in year’s past and I’ve picked up a couple that were new to me. I picked up Of Mice and Men for the first time in twenty-five years and dropped myself into the world of George and Lennie. It was just as immersive and heart-wrenching as the first time I read it as a fifteen-year-old. No, it was better. As perfect a novel as has ever been written.

I’m not a big crier, but my eyes welled, and then tears streamed down my cheeks as George has Lennie close his eyes and imagine their life on their own farm in the closing scene. Maybe you remember the emotional wallop or reading that final scene? Maybe you cried as well?

I went to Goodreads, where I rate and review books I’ve written (if you have an account, friend me!). My jaw dropped. On a 5 star scale, Steinbeck’s masterpiece has received a 3.86 rating with over 1.7 million ratings. A 3.86 for one of the finest pieces of writing on the planet. As of this writing 51,618 people rated Steinbeck’s novel a 1 out of 5 stars. 51,618 people, more than the population of Prescott, Arizona, decided that Steinbeck’s novel wasn’t just average or disappointing… no, it deserved the worst possible ranking they could give a book.

Confession: I handle criticism poorly.

By “handle criticism poorly” I don’t mean that I don’t receive criticism or seek it out. I do both. What I mean is that I tend to hear criticism in BOLD and CAPS LOCK. My default is to overstate the criticism, to universalize it, and to see too much merit in the criticism. I can slide into doubting my calling and gifting.

Fellow discouraged traveler, remember, 51,618 people gave Of Mice and Men 1 star.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       How 32 African Slaves Turned Into Millions: This year we commemorate the 400th anniversary of the tragic start of the slave trade to the Americas. This powerful info-graphic rich article shows how 32 slaves ballooned into millions. 

2.       Why People Don't Think You Appreciate Them Even When You Do: Suzanne Vickberg with helpful advice for any leader. She begins by quoting Gladys Bronwyn Stern: "Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone."

3.       Why Calvinists Should Be the Gentlest: John Newton, in his letter to fellow Christians exhorts gentleness and cautions a lack of gentleness, " If you write with a desire of being an instrument of correcting mistakes, you will of course be cautious of laying stumbling blocks in the way of the blind or of using any expressions that may exasperate their passions, confirm them in their principles, and thereby make their conviction, humanly speaking, more impracticable."

4.       Eternity and Mortality: Jennie Cesario with a beautiful reflection on how a scrape with death shaped her perspective about herself, God, and parenting.

5.       The Ugly History of Mass Incarceration: The United States imprisons more people than any country in the world. And with a disproportionate number of those inmates being black, it is an issue fraught with difficulty. As a former Detention Officer, the complicated history of and solution for our incarceration problem hits close to home. 

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