Forgiveness

Hurt Feelings

Hurt Feelings

Feelings matter. Even if we are certain that truth is firmly in our grasp, it isn’t appropriate to use it like a whip on the back of the skeptic.

In a desire to restore the balance of perceived power, contemporary Western culture has offered a wider berth for those who have historically wielded less power. Our culture declares that our privilege determines whether or not we are allowed to share “our truth.” Intersectionality doles out chips based on a group’s power. Those who come from advantaged portions of society (take me for instance: a white, cisgender (using our culture’s verbiage), male, heterosexual, Christian) are given fewer chips in order to balance the conversation. In this framework, those with more chips are given more freedom to speak “their truth,” even at the expense of others’ feelings, while those with fewer chips are expected to prioritize others’ feelings over “their truth.” Do you see the double whammy inflicted upon those with fewer chips? Unfortunately, this is how our culture has decided to balance truth and love.

How do we navigate this balancing act as Christians? How do we speak the truth in love?

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Jesus Versus the Trade-In Society: Samuel James begins his excellent article, “It seems to me that if there’s one thing that our current version of advertising-based capitalism teaches us all, it’s that everything is replaceable: everything can be reproduced, or traded in for a new and improved model. And that applies to coaches, to churches, to spouses. We live in a trade-in society.”

  2. 9 Myths About Abortion Rights and Roe v. Wade: Kevin DeYoung considers some misconceptions. For instance, “Myth #6: Our abortion laws are mainstream compared with the rest of the world. Truth: The United States is one of only 10 nations that allow abortion after 14 weeks of gestation. Only four countries allow abortion for any reason after viability: Canada, North Korea, China, and the United States

  3. The Ukelele and the Cross: J.A. Medders says, “Theologians have wrestled with the various angles that describe what Jesus did for us on the cross. Some will even argue that there is only one way to describe and define what Jesus did for us on the cross. Rather than pick sides on the theological playground, I want to propose a harmony of notes that are played at the cross of Christ.”

  4. How Not to Pray with a Hurting Loved One: Blake Glosson’s post is helpful to all of us. He says, “There’s certainly a time to give advice, but prayer isn’t the place for it. Prayer is not a free pass to share your opinions with the other person while pretending to talk to God (this is manipulative and the other person will feel it).”

  5. Constructing the Roman Road: A short video on what became a significant cause for the spread of the gospel.

Need a Book for the Pool?

Need a Book for the Pool?

Summer is here! Looking for some good books to dive into this summer? Here are some of my favorite books I’ve read over the first half of this year that I think you’ll love.

Aslan was Wrong (about Forgiveness)

Aslan was Wrong (about Forgiveness)

Like so many others, The Chronicles of Narnia is one of my favorite fiction series of all time. CS Lewis masterfully gives us insight into the heart of Christ and our relationship with him through the figure of Aslan. The tales teach us unforgettable truths about us about friendship, courage, and redemption.

Lewis brilliantly captures the weight of our sin against God. The figure of Aslan helps us see the price Christ paid to atone for our wrongdoings. Near the conclusion of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe we watch an interaction that gives us insight into the cost of our sin. “’Please—Aslan,’ said Lucy, ‘can anything be done to save Edmund?’ ‘All shall be done,’ said Aslan. ‘But it may be harder than you think.’” And indeed it was. The price of Aslan’s life is required to bring about Edmund’s forgiveness.

But, Aslan gets another dimension of forgiveness wrong.

Allow me to set the scene.

A party of Narnians sent by Aslan has just rescued Edmund from his imminent death at the hand of the White Witch. Edmund ended up in the clutches of the White Witch because of his pride, longing for power, and hunger for Turkish delight. His betrayal of his brother and sisters and Aslan himself will endanger all of Narnia and ultimately cost Aslan his life.

How to Forgive

How to Forgive

“How can I forgive them?” It’s a question spoken out of a yearning to release the one who has inflicted injury. It’s a question that is spoken out of hurt and sometimes anger.

How do we forgive the person who keeps sinning against us? How do we forgive the one who sins against us in a grievous way? How do we forgive the individual who sins against us and isn’t repentant?

Forgiveness is mandatory as a Christian. In his depiction of how we ought to pray, Jesus ties up with our forgiveness with the forgiveness we offer, “and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors” (Matt 6:12).

Knowing that we will probably choke on that commandment, Jesus offers an explanation for the stakes of our forgiveness at the end of his prayer, “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt 6:14-15). Goodness gracious. There it is, in black and white. We must forgive the one who has offended us.

Now, to be clear, this is no spiritual tit-for-tat. Jesus is not saying that God will withhold forgiveness from us until we grant it to others. Rather, what Jesus is saying is that the forgiveness we receive from him is demonstrated in our forgiveness of others. Those who have received forgiveness will forgive.

How to Apologize

How to Apologize

We live in an apology-averse culture.

We are allergic to repentance and equally allergic to forgiveness.

Think about it? When was the last time someone repented to you? I mean, truly repented?

The last time a congregant apologized to me, the email began this way (I’ve tweaked it only to protect the one who sent it), “I might have been a little harsh in my email.. I had a very bad week…” In further communication, the individual referenced their apology. Internally I scratched my head. “When did they apologize?” I dug back through the email thread and saw those phrases. That is what they were referencing.

“I might have…” followed by an excuse is no apology.

I don’t say that to attack the individual I am referencing. In fact, I completely understand why, in our culture, they would think that they had apologized.

In our culture, we learn to apologize with phrases that look like this:

· “Sorry.”

· “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

· “I know I shouldn’t have done that, but you shouldn’t have…”

· “I wouldn’t have done that if…”

· “That wasn’t my best.”

None of those are apologies.

By not learning how to apologize, we miss out on good’s purposes for our hearts and for the possibility of true reconciliation.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. She Wants to Meet the Man Who Killed Her Father: Police Officer Richard Houston was killed when he responded to a domestic disturbance. His 18-year-old daughter spoke profoundly at his funeral. Don’t just read this, make sure you watch the 90 second clip.

  2. Just Preach the Gospel? It’s Complicated: Provocative post by Trevin Wax. I appreciated his thoughts. He says, “At its best, “just preach the gospel” serves as a needed warning to stay tethered to the central message of Christianity. At its worst, it means “don’t touch my idol.”

  3. 12 Observations on Spiritual Authority: Samuel James in 12 compact observations considers spiritual authority, its abuse, and the response for those who have been impacted by it (and those who haven’t).

  4. He Gives His Beloved Sleep: Tim Challies begins, “Of all the divine thoughts recorded in the pages of sacred writ, of all the promises God provides to humanity, perhaps none is more moving, none more blessed, none more needful than this: He gives his beloved sleep.”

  5. Previously Unheard Fish Sounds from Restored Coral Reef: The sound of life is beautiful.