This past week my wife, Angel, turned 40. As an opportunity for reflection, she decided to consider what the most important lessons God has taught her. What follows captures her heart and wisdom well. I love seeing how these are lived out in her walk with Christ, our marriage, her parenting, and her counseling practice.[i]
May God’s wisdom through Angel abound to you.
John
40 Lessons for 40 years
God is always for me.
Sitting at the feet of Jesus is the most life-giving, soul-filling, peace-giving place to be. I walk in the overflow of my time with him. I don’t have to set an agenda for that space. I can just be and learn to wait in silence.
I am not my own.
To know who I am in Christ: beloved, adopted, chosen, a priest, a son, the bride, a sheep, free, a saint are non-negotiables in my life that no one and no thing can take away from me. This is who I am and it gives me permission and power to step into my role as wife, mom, and counselor.
My steps are established by my Shepherd who leads me into his pastures before me. I don’t have to strive. I can wait, watch, and follow. I can find gratitude in my circumstance because my Shepherd has gone before me today and equipped me for all I will encounter.
God invites me to rest with gratitude. When I rest, my character grows in patience and steadfastness.
Slowing down teaches me prudence: discretion, sound judgment, and foresight.
I am in daily and desperate need for the Holy Spirit to intersect his power in me.
The Lord is the giver of all wisdom and his wisdom is stored up for me.
Live in the fear of God. Keep his commandments.
Welcome discipline from the Lord. Discipline is a kiss from Jesus that tells me, “I love you too much Angel to let you get away with your sin.”
A teachable spirit leads to life. A proud spirit leads to death.
When I listen to the Lord, I gain life.
Conviction that leads to repentance is God’s favor to me. Repentance leads to praise. Otherwise, my sin will destroy me.
Diligence cannot be microwaved, it cooks slowly.
The diligent prosper.
A broken and contrite heart is a heart that is always welcomed in God’s throne room.
All firstfruits belong to God. Nothing I have is mine. It all belongs to God.
Generosity brings joy to the soul and peace to the mind.
It is my lot on this side of eternity to enjoy life as a gift from God.
God is a God of order. A rightly ordered life brings peace.
When I pray to see my husband as the Lord sees him, I learn to treasure him for who he is. God gives me eyes to see what he is doing in and through his life. When I pray, annoyances cease and gratitude multiplies.
Train a child in the way they should go and entrust the Spirit to do the rest. Our children’s journeys are already known. My job is to love, invest, and encourage. Cheerleading my kids is one of my greatest gifts.
I am called to love, know, speak, do. I cannot speak into a person's life if I don’t know them. I cannot fully know a person well if love is not my driving motive. Any godly doing requires love, knowing, and speaking.
Walking through conflict requires patience, diligence, humility, and love, and it produces a harvest of peace by all that is sown in peace. Walking through trials with God is way better than no trial at all.
Consider others more important than myself. Look at people more intently than my agenda in the moment.
To fight well, I must listen well. God invites me to see a person before I see their behavior.
When I am slow to get angry, I grow in understanding.
Bandaids don’t heal, they only cover.
Tears should never be apologized for. The Lord names every tear I cry. He loves my tears. He brings healing through my tears.
There is accumulative value in doing a little each day. I want my life to be marked by a sequence of deposits that lead to life. There are rarely immediate consequences for neglecting these deposits. Neglect has a cumulative effect.
Saying no is a gift, it demands humility. Just because something is permissible does not mean it is profitable.
Don’t make decisions in an emotionally-charged environment. Wise people know when they don’t know and they wait or seek wisdom from others. Wisdom seeks counsel.
Savor the moments. Making memories are worth making and writing down. Journaling is always time well spent.
I fight others' battles on my knees and with gratitude. Gratitude precedes miracles.
If I find myself trying to be a judge, I must repent and get off my own throne. Only the Lord belongs there.
In every battle, I wear the armor of Christ. Jesus is always at the front line on the battlefield. He invites me to go with him.
Live in the joy of the Lord. When I feel the enemy trying to steal it, I depend on the Lord to revive and realign all I need to restore to me the joy of my salvation.
What God plants cannot be destroyed.
My security is in the fortress of the unchanging Jehovah. What can man do or say to me? I am safe in him.
[i] You can learn more about Angel’s counseling practice at https://wholehopecounseling.com/.